I’m alive and mini status update. Strokes are not to be trifled with nor used as a cudgel to amplify disgusting lies. #FAFO #STROKEFILES

For the record, one handed typing is a royal pain in the ass. As is my husband acting as my secretary and my dictation skills are impaired because of the paralysis

Let’s address the gigantic swamp donkey in the room:

I value my readers and I’m certain the feeling is mutual. That said, I am giving my readers permission to unsubscribe from this newsletter. The reason is I’m mindful my Substack content (Jan 2021 - Oct 11 2022) primarily focused on litigation and public policy and for obvious reasons there has been a change in my content.

While I do not anticipate to solely focus on my stroke and future medical challenges, I am cognizant of the fact that that content is not what my readers signed up for. Conversely, if I may be so bold to ask, perhaps in two or three months you would consider resubscribing. If not I understand and I won’t be offended.

Long and short term medical prognosis

I’m not going to bullshit you. I have a long road to recovery ahead. While I strive to be positive, I need to admit this stroke had brought on a lot of bad days. My medical team is taking very good care of me. So is my spouse, my family, and friends. And for that I am very grateful for your support and that it is not something I take for granted. My medical team warned me about uncontrollable and unexplained emotional outbursts. Fuck me they were right and fuck them for for being right. Below is an abbreviated schedule of my future medical needs:

• Speech therapy 2.5 hours, 3x per week

• Occupational therapy 45 minutes, 2x per week

• Physical therapy 1.5 hours, 2x per week

• On or about November 10th consultation with a vascular surgeon regarding the plaque in my artery and possible ventricular ablation as to prevent a hemorrhagic stroke

For obvious reasons, short term and long term disability are in my future. At the present time, I am completely paralyzed in my right face impacting my speech. I also am paralyzed from my right shoulder to my finger tips. And I am partially paralyzed in my right pelvic wall. As you can imagine, the road to my recovery will be longer than any of us could imagine including myself. This will require me to embrace self care and not lose my shit with my family, friends, and loved ones, which will be hard because I am an alpha female and all the shit sucks. Case in point, having to rely on others to do basic things like cooking, bathing, and brushing my teeth with only my left hand makes me want to throat punch everyone.

Point of personal privilege:

To those who are falsely accusing me of faking my ischemic stroke, I’d say I feel sorry for you, but I feel nothing for you. While largely these trolls are anonymous, I have the resources and the intellect to identify all of your personal information (including your email, addresses, your IP addresses, your IMEI and SSID addresses). In my industry, we don’t make threats, we just file. Luckily, a former judge recently agreed to no longer charge me any fees to archive your lies. Moreover, I have countless attorneys who are personally offended by your lies, inhumanity, and cruelty. And lastly, I have the very good fortune of countless followers who are archiving your vile, cruel, and outright slander.

Pro tip: The statue of limitations resets every time you post unambiguous lies about me on social media. Furthermore, perhaps you should educate yourselves: actual malice, defamation, defamation of character, direct injury, malicious injury… and more broadly see the Federal Rules of Civil Procedure (eff. Dec. 1, 2020). Unlike some, I do not post cryptic information or random inapplicable federal statues. Not to belabor this point, in my line of work we do not make threats, we just file. #FAFO #IHADASTROKEBUTYOUAREANINCURABLEASSHOLE

Forward looking position statement:

Again my road to recovery is going to be long and arduous. I am up to the task because I am not a loser or a fraudster (and I certainly never engage in a grift or a fraudulent GOFUNDME, and I never will). Again I am mindful for how lucky I am. I am equally grateful to the kindness, consideration, and empathy of my many followers. With your humanity, I am working my ass off to overcome the paralysis in my right face, the paralysis from my right shoulder to my finger tips, and the partial paralysis in my right pelvic wall. If you are curious about a stroke, see the American Stroke Association, and learn about B.E.F.A.S.T. for stroke.

To set your expectations, my plan is to publish a Substack article every week and a half to two weeks. But that is not set in stone. As always if I go dark, eventually I will pop back up including if I die…I’M SUPER KIDDING (sort of SNORT). Because Instagram is quick and easy, the plan is to post two reels a day because apparently the doctors say I need a creative mental stimulation. Last point, It is my pleasure to introduce to you for the first time: #STROKEYSPYPUSSY.

Your long overdue saltwater therapy with many more to come.

file411_dc

A post shared by File411 (@file411_dc)

Again I want to personally thank my followers. Your support has meant a lot. I promise you I am working my ass off to get back to my Spicy self. Because nobody puts Spicy in a corner.

P.s (This is the hubby) I think she is feeling better because she wanted spittlestix added to her lexicon along with Shittlestix and she kept herself sane even with me driving. Also, note to self, Ground Cinnamon is entirely different that Ground Cumen (Four smoothies later) Oops!